MARAMING rebelasyon ang nagbabalik na aktor na si Tom Rodriguez sa panayam sa kanya sa ‘Fast Talk with Boy Abunda’ sa GMA7 noong Lunes, Marso 18.

Sinabi niyang dumaan siya sa pinakamadilim na bahagi ng kanyang buhay simula nang maghiwalay sila ng ex-wife na si Carla Abellana.

Sa dalawang taon niyang pamamalagi sa Amerika, marami siyang pinagdaanang pagsubok sa buhay.

Aniya, dapat ay dalawang linggo lamang siyang magso-soul searching pero ito ay nauwi sa dalawang taon.

Mahirap sa simula, aniya, pero kalaunan ay natutunan na niya itong i-enjoy. Natuto siyang magluto, maglaba, at gumamit ng coupon kapag namimili sa grocery. May mga panahong gusto na niyang sumuko.

“I don’t know if I’m allowed to say these but there were times when it was really dark. I thought I was gonna do something to myself that’s irreversible,” pagbabahagi ni Tom.drRead

Tanong ni Kuya Boy, “Sorry, dumaan ka sa stage na you almost contemplated doing suicide?”

Sagot ni Tom:“I was there. But when I saw my nephews, what flashed in my mind was, ‘What would my nephews think if they go through (similar) hardships? If they go through a hard time? ‘Oh, Tito Tom was able to this, I can do it too.’ And I thought I owe them more than that.

“And now I owe my younger self that you can go through the hardest unos, bagyo, kahit ano ang dumaan sa buhay mo, as long as you find that integrity within yourself again.

“You build a trust within yourself and love for yourself and those who matter the most to you, kayang-kaya mo pa rin,” paliwanag pa ng aktor.

Inamin din ng Kapuso actor na napakaraming beses siyang umiyak noon lalo na kapag nakikita niyang nag-aalala na nang sobra ang kanyang nanay.

“There was a time nagtatago ako. I would hide away, until you go through the dark night of the soul, and then you’re able to face your loved ones, face yourself in the mirror, face your family, and then you, you start opening the conversation,” pag-aalala niya.

“Whatever happened in my life, I was also complacent in it, and I’ve taken accountability and responsibility for that, and lahat kayo, may kanya-kanyang battles. Kaya I wouldn’t say it’s just me. It happens to everyone.

“You can go through the hardest as long as you find that integrity within yourself again, that trust, that love for yourself again and those you matter the most to you,” paliwanag ng aktor.

Dagdag pa niya, “Pinakamalaking lesson was kinailangan kong matutunan kung paano pagdaanan lahat ng ingay sa buhay na kalmado lang.

“Hindi ko kayang bumagsak lahat. I started…when other people say na starting from zero, at the time, I was like starting at the negative ‘cause a lot of the things that I thought meant a lot to me, disappeared.

“And then, you realized in that lowest moment, you have a lot to be grateful pala. You have a lot to be thankful for.”

Unti-unti siyang bumangon at hinanap ang sarili. Nagtrabaho siya sa pamamagitan ng pagtanggap ng shows bilang singer, at naging online freelance artist siya sa iba’t ibang kompanya.

“Natutunan ko rin about love, you have to live and vibrate in a frequency of love. Kasi yung itanim mo, fear, takot, kaba. Yung aanihin mo, insecurity, kamalasan. At kapag ganoon, wala na talaga,” pagtatapos ni Tom bago ang ‘fast talk’ portion.

Sa ngayon, pagkatapos ng ‘Magpakailanman,’ may mga inihahanda nang bagong series para sa aktor. At kung muli silang magkakaharap o magkakatrabaho ng ex-wife na si Carla, “No problem with me,’ ani Tom na nakangiti.